Mommy Meme

We're on our college visit with Precious Youngest. Fortunately, Green Girl in Wisconsin posted this . Which made me remember the Hotfessional tagged me for the Mommy Meme too.

Admit that ONE thing you feel awful about involving being a mom. Get it off your shoulders. Once you’ve written it down, you are NO LONGER allowed to feel bad. It’s over with, it’s in the past. Remember, you’re a good mom!

Many years ago when Precious Oldest was in Kindergarten she was a Daisy Scout. Now when I was a girl, Girl Scouts started in first grade with Brownies. What ever time marches on, things change, so on and so forth.

ANYWAY. It was Girl Scout Sunday and Precious Oldest was part of the color guard that was processing up the aisle before Mass. I was her troop leader AND in charge of running to Girl Scout headquarters to pick up the official Girl Scout flag for the ceremony as our school troops had not yet purchased one. Precious Oldest had to be spiffed up, in uniform, and to church early.

As we do any Sunday morning, or did back then with a 3 and 5 year old, we were rushing around like the proverbial chicken with its head cut off and I barked at the Saint to get the flag to church STAT and the children too while he was at it. (Sweet baby jesus why do I have to do EVERYTHING!)

I finished getting dressed, hopped in the car, raced to church and slid into the pew beside the Saint. I knelt to say a quick prayer and with head bowed over folded hands made a sidelong glance and hissed to the Saint "WHERE is Precious Youngest". He blinked a few times and said through clenched teeth, "I thought YOU were bringing her".

I left my baby at home! Alone! Probably with the house going up in flames! I flew back home at warp speed running red lights and stop signs alike.

I went running through the house shouting her name like a crazed person. She was fine. She was playing in her room. She didn't even know she'd been left home alone.

I have a MILLION of these stories. Seriously. If you EVER feel bad about your parenting skills e-mail me. We'll talk. I'll buy the wine.

To remind yourself that you ARE a good mom, list SEVEN things you love about your kids, you love doing with your kids, or that your kids love about you. These are the things to remind yourself of EVERY DAY that you rock!

1. My girls are smart. I don't mean creepy smart, I mean top of their class, Dean's List, admitted to the J School as a freshman, academic scholarship smart. And they don't care WHO knows it.

2. They make me laugh. They have a finely honed wit and a sarcastic streak a mile wide. I have no idea where they get it.

3. They are kind and caring young women. They have friendships that stretch back years with wonderful young people who are like family to us. Their ex-boyfriends NEVER LEAVE. They don't have the heart to have "bad break ups" and so they remain friends.

4. Their were some rocky times in the 13 to 17 year old years, but they never went off the deep end. Between them they had two detentions in high school. Both for uniform violations. There is no smoking or drug use. Except for an occasional glass of wine at home they don't drink. (Well, if they're in a country where it's LEGAL for them to drink they may imbibe.) For those of you smugly sitting there thinking "That she KNOWS of", trust me. I know.

5. They enjoy each others company. They do things together. On purpose. Think back to when you were a teen and the relationship you had with your siblings. I'm just sayin'.

6. They hold hands with me and kiss me in PUBLIC. Like even when their friends are around.

7. They go their own way. As similar as my girls are in many ways, they have vastly different interests. They know they can love and support one another without being in the other's back pocket,

Send this to FIVE other Moms of the Year that deserve forgiveness and a reminder that they, too, are the best moms they can be! Remember to send them a note to let them know you’ve selected them, and add a link to the person who nominated you!


Jen - Whose young daughters remind me very much of my girls at that age.
Jenn - Who is my parenting doppelganger.
Leann - Our neighbor to the north who makes me smile.
Shelley - Who just moved to Denver and had to leave her precious oldest daughter behind so she could stay for her senior year of high school.
Vanessa - Whose children are canine but adorable.

Observation

Last night Precious Oldest and four of her friends had a diner party for their high school debate coach. Their former coach is a gifted teacher and excellent mentor. She had a positive and undeniable and impact on these girls, now off at college in several states. She’s the teacher they all stop to visit when they come back to town.

I sat in the kitchen with a cup of tea while they the girls cooked; I was there for consultation only. They were pretty well organized and needed little help from me. Once their little party was under way the Saint and I went out to grab some dinner.

While we were out we ran into a few folks and didn’t return for a couple of hours. When we got back they were all still sitting at the dinning room table laughing and finishing dessert. The kitchen was clean, the dishwasher was running and they had fixed a plate for Precious Youngest who joined them when she got home from work.

Parenting is a hard job. This raising your children, from the time they are babies, to leave you. There is no grade card, no performance review. God knows your kids won’t tell you whether or not you’re doing it right. But there are moments. Moments when, as a parent, you realize you’ve done a good job. Last night was one of those moments.

GNO: A Re-Cap in Pictures

Stand down everyone! The audit is office related. I work for a Foundation; we have an audit done once a year. Yes, we PAY someone to come in and put us through holy hell. Nevertheless, much paperwork and math related nonsense must be produced by yours truly. And it sucketh mightily. Especially when you ...um... sort of forget that they're coming you know TODAY.

But fear not good people. I had the frivolity of last night to sustain me. We had a wonderful time.

There was laughter...

And food...

and um, wine...

and presents!

We all feel better now, thanks for asking.

GNO

I have my GNO girls coming over tonight. (I've written about these gals before.) We haven't gotten together in long time. Someone got laid off, someone lost their mother after a long illness, someone found out their significant other was a pathological liar. Calls have been made, cards and flowers have been sent, a few visits have occurred; but the large group has not been able to get together for months because life has been kicking the shit out of us.

I set the table yesterday. I made Chicken Tortilla Soup. And got some wine chilling. They'll bring salad, bread, appetizers and dessert. The Saint will be on hand for serving and dishes.

I believe the fellowship of a shared meal can be healing. I hope it works tonight.

Girl's Night Out

My GNO group started very informally about seven or eight years ago. We all met during our tenure with a women’s civic organization. We joined at different times and for different reasons. There have always been eight of us. (Not the same eight - I'll tell Connie's story another time.) Despite requests, we have not added anyone else to the group. We are 40 to almost 60. We are married, single, divorced. Some of us have children and some do not. Four are Republicans, four are Democrats. Religion? All over the map. Suffice it to say we would not have met under other circumstances. Our paths should not have crossed, but they did. Now once every month or so we get together, to share a meal, catch up, lend support, get advice and so it goes.

We used to meet at restaurants but it got a. expensive, and b. loud (as in we were shushed and/or asked to leave on more than one occasion.) Now we just take turns at our houses. S. has had October for I can’t remember how long. She decorates for Halloween but we fix fondue. Heaven only knows how that tradition got started! This year she insisted on doing a Murder Mystery Dinner because we’ve been talking about it forever, but it is next to impossible to get all eight of us in one place at one time. Life? Does not always cooperate! 89 e-mails and four spread sheets passed back and forth. A date was set and the only reason to miss was death, YOURS!

It was a hoot! The setting was a Chicago Speakeasy in 1928. The invitation included the “guest list” with character background. We had: Molly, the flapper; “Torchy”, the club singer; Ernie, the gambler; Eddie “Socks” R. Gyle, the golfer; “Scoop”, the reporter (that was me, complete with fedora!); “Silky”, the madam; Billy “The Kid”, a baseball player and T. Straighten Harrow, the District Attorney. We really got into the spirit of the thing and everyone showed up in costume.

During cocktail hour we read newspaper articles claiming that "Hal Coppone" was missing and presumed dead. (The “hooch” was exceptionally delicious bourbon slush and let’s just say after a couple of snorts the Chicago accents had slipped inexplicably into southern drawls.) At each dinner course everyone had further information to read about the other characters. Directives were included as to what you should “reveal” about the other “guests”. What’s amusing is that you are also given additional background about YOUR character, but you don’t know what, if anything, the OTHER characters know!

Wine started flowing freely with the chicken spedini and fettuccini alfreo; despite my trusty notebook I was having a hell of a time trying to keep everything straight! During dessert everyone makes an accusation, and then the host opens the envelope to reveal the murderer’s identity. My deductive reasoning skills were a tad off, so my supposition was incorrect.

No matter. It was very fun and I highly recommend it if you have a group that can laugh at themselves a little bit!