A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person*

I was a girl when I married. A fresh-faced, twenty-two year old bride.

I knew nothing of life, really, but I was in love.



A quarter of a century later I am still in love.



And suck it people, I can still fit in the dress!



*~Mignon McLaughlin

Worth a Post? Hard to Say

Oops, I didn't mean to fall off the edge of the earth. But what have I been up to that's worth writing about?

That I missed my blogoversary back on August 10th?

That I turned 47 on Monday?

That I haven't heard back about my last interview BUT got called for an interview from the second resume I sent out?

That the Precious Daughters are busy navigating new college classes?

That my parents are celebrating their 48th wedding anniversary today?

I just don't know. What do you think?

One Year

When I started this blog a year ago I felt fragile. My life felt tenuous and vague. I looked OK from the outside, but on the inside, Oy.

I was struggling with the realities of having gone back to the corporate world after an extended stay at home. I left the workplace in December of 1988 to be a mother and a homemaker. Jobs I enjoyed very much.

In 2005, with much upheaval and uncertainty in the Saint's industry, and more so within his company, I realized I shouldn't wait until I HAD to have a job to start to LOOK for a job. Let's face it, seventeen years out of the workplace isn't a 50 yard dash on the mommy track; it's a fucking MARATHON!

Additionally, I had failed to do any of the things one is supposed to do if they EVER plan on working again. I didn't work part time, I didn't "keep my hand in it", I didn't "maintain my contacts", I didn't "build a network". I had just walked away. I had to cobble together a resume with nothing more than leadership positions in every volunteer organization you can think of.

The first job I took was an unmitigated disaster that resulted in my resigning after only six months. As bad as it was, I learned a lot from the experience and the man who had hired me gave me such a glowing reference that my second job search lasted four weeks instead of four months.

I feel more settled now. Less anxious. Able to look ahead and know that I can do this; this "work" thing. (It helps that I'm being paid to do shit I used to do for FREE!) It's taken me three years to get my feet under me, to catch my breath, to adjust to my families time being dictated by someone else's timetable.

Writing here has been cathartic. Sharing my experience and hearing about the changes a lot of you are facing has made my journey easier. Outside of the Saint and the Precious Daughters, no one in my "real life" knows about this blog. I don't need to censor what I write here and that has been crucial to the therapeutic aspect of blogging for me.

All of this is a long winded way of saying to my readers that I thank you for stopping by. I thank you for your comments and insights. I thank you for sharing your experiences through your writing.

And if you ever wander over in the direction of Whoville, know that a comfy chair, a good meal and a glass of wine is waiting for each and every one of you!

Momentous dates that passed by without comment while we were on vacation

June 21st was the summer solstice, my favorite day of the year. As a warm weather loving, outdoor dining, gardening, sun worshipping fiend this is my favorite time of year.

AND

June 22nd was our twenty third wedding anniversary. *pauses , waits for applause to die down* I have lived with this man for half my life. I squeeze my eyes shut and I can remember the girl that walked down the aisle that day in June. She was twenty two, far too young to get married, and very naive. (Aren't all twenty two years olds?)

It took that girl many years to grow up and realize a thing or two about marriage. And even thought the Saint was twenty eight years old that June day, that's not fully grown yet either now is it? So I guess they learned some things together.

While you would undoubtedly gain vast insights on connubial bliss where I to share what we've learned I'll save that for another day. Because I'm so excited!!!!

You do remember the significant wailing and gnashing of teeth that has been going on around here over my P.O.S. desk top don't you? Well look what was waiting for me when I got home last night!!!

And such a sweet and sentimental note!

(I always get you flowers for our anniversary....This Counts!)

So instead of ripping the hair out of my head in the office, I'm clicky clacking away from the comfort of the sofa while enjoying a cup of coffee. Don't you just LOVE happy endings?

I don't know how they did it

My parents had their 46th wedding anniversary last Sunday. My mother was twenty and my father was twenty three when they got married. My Nana remembers watching them drive away (in a borrowed car) and crying: my father was still in school, neither one had a job and they were broke.

I was born two days shy of their first anniversary. My father was still in college and working nights. We lived in a five story walk-up in the Bronx. My mother has great stories about those days, but I’ll leave that for another time.

When my second sister L was born, my father left law school for full time employment. (With five mouths to feed, working nights at the ice cream factory was not going to cut it.) After three daughters in rapid succession, my mother gave birth to two sons who died in infancy. The first child was stillborn and our brother Richard passed away when he was six months old. My sisters have no memory of these bothers, but I have vivid recollections of visiting Richard at Children’s Hospital in Philadelphia. (When we buried first my grandfather and then my grandmother, it was disconcerting to see those two small headstones between the graves of our grandparents.) Against the advice of doctors my mother went on to have two more children, my brothers T and J.

She was only thirty when J was born.

Faith and character. I am born of strong stock.

Happy Anniversary Mom and Pop, and many more.