Dress Code Violation

I shed my work day like a snakeskin. Within sixty seconds of hitting the door my work clothes come off. It's not as if my office has some draconian dress code that includes skirts and pantyhose.

(Hell, I pretty much give myself a jeans day every Friday!)

No, for me the shedding has more to do with stripping off the work day. It's a physical letting go and sinking into the comfort and routine of home.



But let's be honest; this time of year usually finds me going from work clothes straight to pajama pants. They're just so comfy.








I mean for the lova’ God it's, cold, dark and snowy. Don't I deserve a little flannel with an elastic waist?






Chances are I'm in for the night and if you happen to stop by? I don't give a rats ass.







However this winter I've taken to entertaining in my PJs.










Hell, I've taken to going to other peoples homes in my PJs.








Last week we were headed to my parents’ house for dinner. I’d been on autopilot when I got home from work and already had my pajamas on. I wondered aloud if my mother would mind my showing up for DINNER in my pajamas. The Saint simply shrugged and said, “You don’t actually SLEEP in them, so they’re not REALLY pajamas, they’re HOUSE PANTS!”

HOUSE PANTS! Is it any wonder I love that man?!

Sometimes....

Sometimes I think

Jerry Scott and Jim Borgman

have a hidden camera in my house.

I'm just sayin'.

Link to "Zits"

Random Thoughts

Oh the randomness currently rolling through my brain.

We have had THE most unbelievable fall weather. Very Little Rain = Much Sunshine. You have no idea how this pleases me. The windows have been open for weeks upon weeks. It has only been in the last few days I’ve left the heat on for an entire 24 hours.

Precious Youngest was home this past weekend. She needed a break. She is struggling right now. She is in a difficult period of discernment. She is my worrier by nature and I’m losing some sleep on her behalf.

I’ve been notified of two large awards for grants I wrote in late summer. Let me tell you; money is tight and competition is stiff. I feel pretty good about this.

I am afraid I have to walk away from helping my sister with her finances. I had hoped to keep her little ship afloat until she could deal with some long standing issues. My assistance is now being perceived as interference. She is resentful to the point that it is affecting our relationship. I am afraid for her, but I can not make an almost forty seven year-old woman DO anything she doesn’t want to do.

I have a sort of a braggy thing I keep writing about and then deleting. You know what? Make that two things.

The hot flashes. Oh my God people; kill me now. I have an appointment with a doctor next week. I am hoping there is something to be done.

See? Random.

Overheard

Fannie: I need to tell you something and I want to be very clear about of my intentions so no one gets the wrong idea.

The Saint: *blink* *blink*

Fannie: I’m going to have to start sleeping naked.

The Saint: *blink* *blink* Because of the hot flashes?

Fannie: Yes.

The Saint: So you showing up naked will not necessarily be an indication that you're looking to get lucky?

Fannie: Precisely!

Aaaaand I'm back

Here’s the deal; if I were you I would NOT want to hear about my fucking fantastic vacation. Don’t get me wrong – once I pull pics off the camera you are damn well GOING to hear about it, but in the meantime let me share a little inappropriate personal revelation.

I have been dealing on and off with mega hot flashes due to that bitch we call menopause. The upside is that I have not had a period since SEPTEMBER 2009. That’s somewhere in the neighborhood of five MONTHS. Needless to say this is welcome turn of events.

But sweet baby jesus the hot flashes! All winter I’ve been sleeping with the bedroom window open. Yes, as in even if it BELOW ZERO AND SNOWING I’m sleeping with the damn window open so I don’t wake up in a pool of my own sweat three times a night.

These hot flashes have been coming and going for a while. Oddly I’ll have weeks of relief where they are minimal in number, duration and intensity. As of late I HAD been sleeping clear thought the night which is six kinds of awesome. Then BAM – hotter than the hammered down hinges of hell.

The last several days those suckers were back with a vengeance! By the plane ride home Sunday I was in agony. I must have woken up six or seven times last night. Sheet thrown off, sheet pulled back on, rinse and repeat. I had to dry my hair bare assed naked this morning or risk passing out on the cold, tile floor. Which in hindsight sounds delightful; people it was sixteen degrees outside!

Then mid-morning it hit me. What did I NOT do all last week? What do I fail to do on the weekends and over holidays and the like? Drink GREEN TEA.

Back about a year or so ago I added green tea to my morning office routine. Having read all these bits and pieces about the virtues of green tea I finally found one that didn’t taste like...well…grass clippings that had been steeped in manure.

So as I sipped my morning brew and realized I did not feel as though I were about to spontaneously combust I got to pondering cause and effect. Is it possible all that stands between me and insanity is a teabag? Discuss among yourselves.

Happy New Year

I have two important, auspicious announcements to make so listen up:

1. I am making a New Years resolution.
   Shut up, I am! I have never seen an eye doctor; the only eye exams I've had have been done at the DMV. So in 2009 I resolve to make an appointment to have an honest to God eye exam, performed by a real doctor! I'm telling you now, the Saint is going to faint when he finds out! He's been pestering me to do this for YEARS!
   
   
2. The New Year can kiss my ass.
   No one wants to see an add for this pop up in their in-box.
   
   
   
   Why Fannie, you're thinking to yourself, that's not SUCH a bad nightgown. Well that's because you have not yet read the description:
   
   
   Hot Flash V-Neck Sleepshirt
   "Better Sleeping Through Science
   Busy days call for restful nights, and Hot Flash Sleepwear helps you get your just desserts. An advanced process, which blends moisture-wicking polyester with silky bamboo-based rayon, builds-in patented Heat Release Technology to move moisture out and away from your body almost instantly."
   
   And that's not all. Evidently there is an entire line of sleepwear designed for women just.like.me. But is this what I need to find out at the dawn of the New Year? I think not. Sheesh, a girl could get a complex!

In any event, Happy New Year to you and yours. May 2009 bring you joy, peace, happiness and a sweat free nights sleep!