I have in recent years tried the "shut the door" approach. Hell, they live on another FLOOR. The entire upstairs is theirs, and I don't go up there very often any more. But here's the thing, every once in awhile I DO go up. To check in. To bring fresh rolls of toilet paper and boxes of Kleenex. Or after a Target run with shampoo, deodorant and sundry erm... female...erm...products. And what I see makes me nuts.
I don't get a lot of back up on this issue. The Saint grew up with a brother who, now in his late forties, still moves every four or five years when his place gets so deplorable even HE can't stand it. So the Saint's idea of squalor is a tad different than mine. I think this is where the ambivalence comes in. I am always the "nag". Raining on the collective parade with my "expectations". So I back off and try to ignore things. But the reality is I swallow the disappointment (turned irritation, turned anger) until so much pressure has built up that I explode.
So I think I'll accept the recommendations of Suburban Correspondent and Mary Alice; a "specific list" of must do's and "ride their ass like a monkey until new organized energetic clean synapses form in their brains". I feel better already!
4 comments:
"gentle reminders" - Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, thunk! (That's me, laughing my head off.) Oh, that's a good one. So glad to know that someone got the saintly children...
And, gee, I am flattered! Although, unlike Mary Alice, I wouldn't count on the formation of those synapses...
You could have some boot camp fun with this, too: "Room ready for inspection, Ma'am!" Hee, hee.
Oh, I so have the same problem at my house. I will never understand why clothes need to be tossed hither and fro onto the floor, and why papers and books from school also need to be scattered everywhere. You have a HAMPER, and a DESK...use them!
This particular subject makes me absolutely crazy, because I just can't stand the shit all over the floor. And with me working nights, it usually ends with me yelling in the morning about whatever they didn't do the previous night. It's always something.
And it's not just their rooms. Coke cans on the computer desk, empty plates on the entertainment center, miscellaneous trash that somehow ends up on the floor, clothes, socks, shoes, GAH! You would think the parent that is actually home in the evenings could maybe monitor this situation. You would think.
Here's where I'm bad: I end up putting their clothes away, because if I leave them on their beds, they will wind up in a heap on the floor. I pick up their dirty clothes, yell and them and throw them in the hamper, because I can't stand it. Perhaps I have the problem, but there you go.
Just to clarify, I pick up the dirty clothes, yell at the kids, then throw the clothes in the hamper. I don't yell at the clothes.
Well, I yell at the clothes AND the kids and then the kids put them away. You have to be so specific:
"Here are your clean clothes, take them up stairs and put them away IN the drawers. Hang the clothes up that are on hangers IN your closet....shut the closet AND the drawers.....report back."
Post a Comment